The Problem With the Technological Age

For the last few years, there have been concerns voiced in the media about humans missing their intimacy needs because of the prevalence of texting, email, and social media.  I can see that as a valid point.  I have had entire relationships that never became live and in person.  I tell these men that they are just ghosts in my phone and that their promises of love mean nothing since I don't see them.  But we would text each other constantly, depend on each other to be there electronically.  We rarely saw each other live and in person, but through texting we shared our deepest thoughts and feelings.

The problem with sharing all of yourself through writing is that you miss some of the great parts of people that can only be experienced in close contact.  Tone of voice, little facial expressions, quirky habits, and body language are all things that can't be substituted through written words.  And not just those things, but the physical connection too...the touch of his hand, the look in his eyes, and even a hug when needed...cannot be found in a text message no matter how many cute smilies we invent.

I think that this problem, the problem of lacking intimacy in our lives, can not be blamed on technology.  I think when our ancestors were tribal that people pulled close together for the usual reasons:  family ties, sex, safety.  As human lives became more agrarian, people put more distance between their farming families and the general public, separating themselves.  This is also where I think the current idea of what a family consists of came from. And in this way our society pulled further and further away from other people.  The attitude to join together wasn't restored as we moved back into cities and apartments.

I don't know about you, but I need that closer connection.  Even when at times I've been a self professed hermit, I know that I need other people to commune with.  If we aren't sharing our lives with others, then we are missing a major part of being a human.  Sometimes I've felt confused by what kind of relationship I was in, whether its a purely electronic relationship or a live one, but in the end, without that live, physical connection it doesn't matter what kind of relationship it is.  And there is no point in a relationship with a ghost.