Random Acts of Kindness

I often hear that we should be committing more Random Acts of Kindness.  Put a quarter in someone's parking meter.  Take dinner to a friend that has been sick or has a new baby.  Read to your neighbor's child so she can finish something she has to do in peace.  Leave an area cleaner than you found it.

I'm one of those people that naturally gives until it hurts.  One of my friend's calls my house "Hansen's House for the Homeless" because we constantly end up taking in some stray creature, usually a teenager.  I've been known to slip money in my friend's purses when they say they don't have enough for gas or diapers.  I have even bought jackets and backpacks for children that don't have these things at the school I used to teach at. It's just who I am, I don't know how I became this way, but it hurts me to not be able to help others.

Occasionally throughout my life there have been people that helped me out and gave me a hand.  But in general, kind acts don't come to me, not even from myself, especially not from myself.  I am so busy being self-sacrificing that I get forgotten.  So I am finally trying to learn to be kind to myself, to treat myself as I would a friend or stranger that I saw in need.

I am teaching myself to do things for myself that I used to only do for others.  I now wear my contacts and nice clothes and makeup for myself, not just because I'm going to see someone special.  I now shave my legs every time I shower, even in winter, just because I deserve to have smooth legs inside my jeans.  I now cook what I want for dinner instead of only making special meals for others.  I now go to places that I want to visit or to movies that I want to see, instead of waiting for someone else to want to go or just skipping it because it didn't interest anyone else.  I now buy myself flowers and give myself beautiful spaces in my home, instead of just making the house nice for my sweetie or my kids.  I make time for myself to write, which is a great source of relaxation, empowerment, and joy to me.  I'm learning.

In this learning process, I have discovered that most of my Acts of Kindness are planned.  I may decide quickly, but there is a plan with an expected outcome before I act.  It's no different for Acts of Kindness for myself.  I have to plan them and have an expected outcome that generally should be my own satisfaction, peace, or happiness.

So try it.  Plan some time for yourself.  Plan an activity just for you.  Plan a special meal with all your favorite foods or a dinner party with your favorite people.  Do something to make yourself happy, because in the end no one else can.

And for those of you that aren't natural born givers, watch the rest of the world.  There are needs everywhere. If you can't take someone in, donate.  If you can't volunteer your money, volunteer your time.  If you can't do anything else, clean out your drawers and closets and donate the things you don't love, use, or need to a charity.  And if you need a reason, besides treasures in Heaven, remember that most donations are tax deductible.